Two?

Today, the African nursing student (I actually don't know where he's from or what he studies) became TWO LAPTOPS MAN.

He has two laptops, a PC and Mac, set up at his table. The Mac has a fancy tilted standing desk contraption attached while the PC has to sit flat on the table like garbage.

In addition to being completely unhelpful when someone breaks the quiet room rules, he now makes twice as much noise. Twice as many dings, bings, whistles, and bloops. An eternity to settle and get his master control station set up.

Thank you, TWO LAPTOPS MAN. I know we are in good hands with you in charge.