Jail Time
Today, I almost went to jail. Mush Mouth made his triumphant return to the quiet room after weeks of absence. It probably took him 20 minutes to get settled with multiple bags within bags. Then, he proceeded to eat a 20-piece chicken tender meal, smacking his lips and licking his fingers with each bite, and licked the sauce containers clean. I don't think the man actually has teeth, so I don't know how he chewed with so much noise. He definitely can't close his mouth when he eats.
Luckily, I have Metal Detector and laser-fine focus, so I didn't have to murder him.
Also, just as I was leaving, someone pronounced "vice versa" as [vise ee versa]. I almost went to jail twice.